More nature (combined with less people) is a cure for many things. Over Easter, my partner and I went on a 2-night getaway in North Wales, and it certainly didn’t disappoint. The choice to stay somewhere rural rather than a bustling city is one we’re relieved to have made. We swapped glittering lights for simple sunsets, noisy bars for forest walks, and retail shops for Italianate pastels. Cities undoubtedly serve their purpose, but sometimes you just need to remove yourself from them. Here’s a rundown of our time there.
Portmeirion Village is a very pretty, miniature village built by a rather eccentric man, Sir Clough Williams-Ellis, that has been welcoming visitors since 1926. Also home to the dystopian television series, The Prisoner (1967-1968), Portmeirion is a vibrant setting. Doused in pinks, purples and greens, it sports ocean-hued arches and turquoise balustrades, peach domes and pastel yellow facades, neatly manicured hedges and cone-shaped trees, terra-cotta galleries and sandy towers.
Even in the relentless Friday drizzle (and at one point much heavier than that!) the liveliness of the paint and the sweetness of the structures was still able to shine through. We managed to witness some small, speckled birds pulling up worms, a wedding party (the bride in a blinding gold jacket; replacement sun?), and make jokes about how ‘Italian’ the Asian statues were, including a Burmese Dancer and a golden Buddha (this was before we read that ‘Italianate Village’ was in reference to the colour scheme only)!
At £18 per full-priced adult, it isn’t cheap and does not allow dogs (which may or may not be a problem for you). The space is small (probably more than you think), quick for the average person to walk around, and unless you’re staying on site, the ‘Residents Only’ areas are outside the remit of a day visit. Definitely worth seeing once due to the strange mashup of styles, the delightful colour scheme and a walk along the coast during summertime. Friday was not the day for such joys.
Our next stop was the beautiful Gwydir Forest (oh so vast, oh so many trails) for a quick 2 miler on the Craig Forris walk in Cae’n y Coed. We made our way through red tree stumps, little waterfalls, lots of mossy goodness, and a view of snow-capped mountains from the lookout.
Settling in our Airbnb, a peaceful place tucked away at the top of a long, gravel driveway in Llanrwst (we saw a baby bunny on this drive) was delightful. The star of the show was the dreamy view from the bedroom window. The adorable courtyard was too wet to use in the sporadic weather, but a dry day would elicit charm. Our stay was amplified by a mysterious resident woodpecker, and several bumble bee friends. There was also a spider I ignored.
Bryn Williams Bistro was our dinner booking, a 25 minute drive from the Bnb. Located at Port Eirias, picture windows showcase a glorious view of the sea. An open kitchen in an open space creates a social atmosphere, the staff friendly and engaging. Excited to try a restaurant that had won the AA Restaurant of the year for Wales Award 2019/20 and retained the Bib Gourmand by Michelin for a third year for their ‘exceptionally good food at moderate prices,’ we stuck our nose in a menu!
I had a double serve of Penderyn (when in Wales … ) ‘Rich Oak’ whisky (and later, a mojito) while Timmy had … a beer I don’t remember (likely an IPA) 😂 The whisky was lovely (obviously) and the cocktail refreshing.
Now, Timmy (please don’t call him this; he will kill you slowly) was quite happy with the food, while I was disappointed. His salt and pepper squid with mint, lime mayonnaise and spring onion (never mind spring onions, we were spring chickens in there! Old crowd) was delicious and substantially portioned, but regrettably far too salty (the burning kind, which we both agreed). I’m sweet, so it balanced out 😏
My dish sounded a hell of a lot nicer than it was: smoked eel, roasted cauliflower, mustard dressing. I’m a bit funny with dressings, so I asked for it on the side and thank God I did. Far too vinegary for my liking, though I realise this is a me thing; Timmy loved it. The rest was … bland to say the least. Both the eel and the cauliflower tasted of … well, nothing at all! Shame, coz one of my nicknames is ‘Moore-ay eel.’ Kate Moore, ya know? I’m looking at you, Shaun Monkfish!
My main dish was crab claw linguini with ginger, chili & spring onion. Sounds flavoursome, doesn’t it? It wasn’t. Timmy reckons he has ruined me with his over-flavoured cooking, but whilst this is plausible, I don’t think that’s why I deemed it to have little flavour. I think it just … had little flavour! The sauce was also too runny (not good for noses, not good for dinners).
The boy’s main was most definitely superior to mine: smoked haddock, crushed potato, poached egg, Beurre Blanc sauce. Very nice from what I remember, although I was a few drinks in, and Timmy seemed very satisfied with the ensemble. Plus, I love a runny egg. One of the joys of life, in fact!
So. Some good food, some average, but perhaps the wrong dishes were chosen that night, or the wrong chefs were on! The view was incredible, service fast and friendly, booking required, and if you’re going to have the squid, bring a 2L water bottle with you!
Saturday Morning
I wake to the sound of sheep, as sunlit hills roll into vision. Birdsong is a distant alarm that only gets dreamier. The rush of traffic is far enough away to be soothing, a veil of promise that swings across the Welsh landscape. Ground coffee calls to me … as do the chocolate brioche rolls! I let the sound of the hill view play a little longer, then head into the kitchen.
I find a gorgeous book on the shelf next to the bed, called Into the Forest by Dr Quing Li, an engaging read about the forests of Japan and the healing that happens inside of them.
What I love about Japanese culture is that everything seems so poetic. Not just every living thing, but every object seems to have a meaningful story behind it, usually lyrical. Akasawa Forest in Agematsu, Japan, offers (or did at the time of writing) medical check-ups in the forest environment. I’ve added this to my many list of books to read. I really felt a connection to this one, and maybe you will too.
Right. Coffee down, clothes on, brain working (kind of), so off we go to Conwy Water Gardens for birdies and breakfast! To be clear, the birdies and the breakfast are not related …
The BDD (Bold Duck Duo)
It sounds so simple, but the highlight of the gardens were the tame mallard ducks who are very used to people. Because of this, they will walk (waddle) right up to you and eat out of your hand. They will then follow you in the hope that you will feed them again, and again, and maybe even again. If you think they’ve forgotten about you, you’re wrong! They will later appear out of nowhere, turquoise heads glistening in the sun.
There were two ducks in particular, Mister and Missus Mallard, referred to collectively by us as ‘The BDD’ (Bold Duck Duo). Several nip-tickles on the palm later, Missus was not letting Mister have his food before her! Or at all? Luckily, Mister got his food eventually. And some more. And … more.
The DTWR (Duck That Wasn’t Real)
Full disclosure, I have only just created the above title, based on the brilliance of this bird. We saw the most spectacular duck, never before seen (by us) called a ‘Mandarin Duck’ (male, of course, no doubt to get the female’s attention!). He was quite the eater, but we couldn’t get close and had to take photos through wire fencing (thanks, Timmy, for getting the shot).
This duck breed was introduced from the Far East, where it can still be found in China, Japan, Korea, and parts of Russia. My first thought was that the Mandarin Duck doesn’t look real but drawn into existence, its colours laid on and separated by bold black marker and fine pen. I applaud the artist. It looks so real! Oh wait …
Now, who wants a pancake breakfast? WE DO! Conwy Water Gardens is home to The Dutch Pancake House, a quaint little eatery surrounded by nature and wildlife. The pond outside the pancake house window ripples with Koi Fish in orange (Orenji Ogon/Benigoi), black (Karasugoi), and other variations, while coins glint gold at the bottom. The water’s wrinkled image projects on to a tree trunk on the edge, a soothing piece of art, hypnotic. Sunlit ribbons climbing the bark.
A low-down on the menu: The drinks weren’t great. Timmy couldn’t cope with his cappuccino (one sip was all it took for him to decide he’d rather go coffeeless for breakfast) and my hot chocolate was … well, let’s put it this way: it seemed to be the kind of thin, instant powder you’d buy at the supermarket, topped with whipped cream and tiny marshmallows. So once the topping was gone, there wasn’t much left to be excited about!
The food, thank GOD, was good. I opted for sweet (the Dutch Sweet Pancake, consisting of hot cherries, whipped cream, vanilla ice cream) while Timmy went for savoury (the Mexican Pancake, consisting of spicy chicken, kidney beans, tomato, sweetcorn, onion, peppers, coriander, spicy salsa). We both devoured our dishes, and shared just a little. SUGAR OVERLOAD FOR ME. Let’s burn that off at our next stop (where, actually, I think I had more sugar!) 🙈
Conwy Castle was pretty damn crazy, and by crazy I mean WOW! This magnificent medieval fortress that still towers over the town after 700 years (you should know this line was taken from their website) sort of took our breath away. ‘In the distance rise the craggy mountains of Eryri (Snowdonia) and spread out below you are the harbour and narrow streets of Conwy – still protected by an unbroken 1,400-yard (1.3km) ring of town walls.’
We climbed the towers, squeezing ourselves up (and then down) the narrowest of steps, saw a shitload of pigeons, and caught some sensational views. Had some coffee too, and … some more sugar.
We checked out the Betws-y-Coed shopping strip next, where Timmy bought some Scarpa walking boots. Finally! Now we both have proper walking boots (oh, the things you get excited about when you’re OLDer!)
There was a hint of hANGER (on my behalf) when we had our very early dinner at Y Stablau. For our matching burger dinners (cute!), we chose the Y Draig: spiced Welsh beef patty topped with Snowdonia red dragon cheddar & jalapeños. This was served in a brioche bun with salad, Stablau coleslaw, and chips. It was all delicious! The Hanger Monster retreats … for now.
A little stop at Swallow Falls before retreating to our Bnb was a burst of oxygen in the lungs. It was £2 each to get through the turnstile (a wee surprise) and I did bash my arm on the thing, which caused a memento bruise that’s still rocking my left arm. Anyway! Thank you, Timmy, for having cash on you. Running water is so peaceful to me, where the rush is so beautifully loud that you can’t hear your thoughts. It really was disturbing. Not really! 😂 It was tranquil; truly comforting.
The Day We Left the Silence
Back to Gwydyr Forest Park (different section; there’s many entry points; ask Timmy for more info, I’m useless) for a morning walk through the Hafna Miner’s Trail (2¼ miles/3.6 kilometres and 1.5-2 hours in length).
This walk was the one; possibly our favourite of the whole trip; the kind of stunning silence that holds your hand and strokes your hair. And … wait for it … I was able to wee in the midst of it without concern (I am usually very concerned about being seen). And if you know me (well, you’re about to), my bladder is not my friend. Sometimes it surprises me by doing something nice, but this is a rare occurrence. I digress! Back to the forest.
We pass capped mine shafts, tunnel entrances and the remains of long-abandoned mills. Information panels tell us stories along the way.
But … the greenery! The trees, the moss, the sky, the hills, the painfully beautiful streams running through it all! This was the shooting star. The impact. The dream. And we got to be a part of it.
Our last stop before heading home was the gorgeous Bodnant Garden in Tal-y-Cafn, Colwyn Bay. Quite clearly, breakfast baps with coffee is the only way to break into late morning (and we were the very last breakfast order they were taking; if we’d missed it, Timmy would be been fine but I would have thrown an absolute tanty). And … BREATHE.
What can I say about the gardens … utterly disgusting. I mean, urine stains on a stairwell would be prettier. Ha! I’m completely joking. The gardens were impressive, and housed my absolute favourite, the Chinese Red Bark Birch 😍 Well, at least my favourite trunk. It’s simply the richest, most metallic, remarkably hypnotic thing to look at.
What we found puzzling, however, was the fact that only the Latin names were shown on the tree tags. We’ve never experienced this before at gardens or arboretums (they usually have the English name too), because, let’s face it, who took Latin as a major? Not I.
Later, wind sweeps medicinal joy through the air, carries the short but sharp scent of pine up our noses. GOD I LOVE PINE. It reminds me of Christmas, pesto, and Laphroaig. I genuinely think I could smell it all day. But then it wouldn’t be as special, would it?
At some point, we saw the flash of a heron. After Timmy realised it was not in fact a statue, we were able to view this fascinating creature from a distance for all of … ten seconds? And then it was gone, leaving us to wonder if it was all a dream.
On the way out, at the garden centre/shop, Timmy bought a lil’ tree (and sneakily, some wicked Snake’s Head seeds for me), while I bought The Nature Remedy by Faith Douglas, for less than half price! It’s a physically heavy book for the lightness it promises. I look forward to dipping in and out of the pages.
Highball
Heigh-ho, Heigh-ho, it’s home to Shrews we go … and what better way to sweeten the ride than with one of these babies, complete with matching top?
Thanks for driving, Timmy, my love. What a peaceful, beautiful, life-affirming break we had together. And what a phenomenon the natural world is.
The Dark Alive 